by Jack Bowman
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A statement about the controversy of the performance.
"Lets consider the most recent performance “Jesus and the Mongolians” Don’t forget, as it is being performed, that Nursery Rhyme Jack is performing it. And he is a baby serial killer that cannibalizes them after he cooks them on the barbeque. And hopefully you can pick out that the bible story is made up. Could this mean that all bible stories are made up? And don’t forget the symbolism. I gut a fish as I am telling the story.
All in all the controversy is good. I think it was Toulouse Lautrec that said “the art is always greater than the man” So I win. The art is talked about after it is done. It continues after the artist is gone, as all great art must. It is like it gets a toehold in eternity. "
A performance Art piece. Text is spoken as a fake fish is being scaled. Need a board, nail, hammer, knife and paper (fake) fish made out of two scanned pictures of a fish glued together with cotton tubes of fake blood and fake internal body parts. Copies of the “Evolution Bible” will either available (free) or handed out by an assistant.
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To be done in the tone of “Jack Handy’s Deep Thoughts” of Saturday Night Live.
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Hi Boys and Girls.
I am Nursery Rhyme Jack.
I am sure you have heard of Donner, Dahmer, and of course old Ed. Really good at eating the dead.
And there is Nursery Rhyme Jack. Carries the babies in a gunny sack and cooks them up on the barbeque rack.
I am going to show you how to gut a fish tonight.
Since this is bible study night and we sure are not at Bible Study, I am going to tell you a story about Jesus and the Mongolians while I gut my fish.
I bet the Mongolians would have been nice to Jesus. He should have gone to Mongolia. He could have gotten there you know.
About everyone in Utah says he visited the American Indians. He got there OK. You know that walk on water thing.
When Jesus lived in the Mid-east he rode a Donkey. But if he had moved to Mongolia he could have ridden those little horses. I have heard that riding a donkey isn’t fun but I have ridden horses and they are pretty cool. Also the Mongolian ones are really, really fast.
I bet the Mongolians would have been nice to Jesus. He could have got there you know. Marco Polo did and he couldn’t even walk on water.
Jesus would have had to deal with that Gobi Desert. But Jesus liked deserts. He grew up right at that Sahara and have you ever been to Utah? It is all desert.
Even Marco Polo could walk on a desert. But he couldn’t walk on water. Jesus could you know.
I am sure the Mongolians would have been nice to Jesus. They would have laughed and pointed when he rode in on his donkey. But then they would have given him one of those little horses. But those little horses couldn’t walk on water. Unless it was frozen of course. Then anybody could walk on water.
The first time Jesus shows the Mongolians that he could walk on water they laughed hysterically. It was frozen. The Mongolians then danced on the water with their little horses. Jesus was amazed. He thought he was the only one that could walk on water. Of course when the spring came the Mongolians with their little horses tried it. It didn’t work.
Then it was Jesus’ turn to laugh. He just had to. Watching those little Mongolians and little horses trying to walk on water was really funny.
Jesus rolled and laughed hysterically. He rolled and laughed so much that he created a dust cloud that went all the way to that big wall that the Chinese built to keep out the immigrants.
The Mongolians would have liked Jesus. They are near geniuses you know. Genghis Kahn. That is really close to genius.
If Jesus had gone to Mongolia he would not have to sleep with his donkey as he did in Bethlehem. The Mongolians would have built him one of those little round houses. And his donkey could run free outside. Gobi Desert you know. His donkey wouldn’t go far. He is going to stay there. Close to the little round house and water.
Yea Jesus really missed a great opportunity. He should have gone to Mongolia. The Mongolians would have been nice to him.
Well I am finished gutting my fish.
Fish saves
They save really well.
I think I will save this one until tomorrow.
The only problem is that when they rot they smell the same. So you can’t really tell when they are rotten.
Have a good night Boys and Girls
Enjoy your fish tomorrow.
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